I bumped into a couple of girls from the third floor while brushing my teeth... and it really cheered me up... they are so nice, and that one girl is so bubbly and cute, we talked about horoscopes and stuff, and she said I'm so 多愁善感, so I probably have a hidden Pisces, etc etc. I'm happy for now. We kept laughing too.

I'm a strong and independent woman. But I can't help it that it gets hard at night. I'll allow that one weakness for now. I'll forgive myself for that. I'll work hard in the morning, tomorrow. I'll do my best.

I cried so hard earlier, on my floor in my room. I actually had mascara on today, and it ran. I bought nail polish yesterday too. Maybe I'll wear a t-shirt tomorrow. I'm getting more and more honest, telling people how I feel.

I visited the Fine Arts Museum to look for inspiration, it was free for Harvard students. I was surprised. That's good. I found this courtyard, the garden. It's so beautiful. It might be my favourite place. When you look up, it's the blue-ness, and criss-crossed with fading white lines. And the albatross circling. きっとシミュレーションと思った。 The birds were chirping and diving. I found inspiration.

I looked but I couldn't find. I couldn't. But I won't give up. I love You. I hold on to You. You are the only one keeping me alive. I scrape through the night. I will be strong in You. In You.



....................................................

posted by sj @ 27 November 2011 1:22 AM | permalink |